Brisbane High Schools - How Many Students...

HOW MANY STUDENTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB AT...

Churchie: Two - one to call the electrician and one to call daddy to pay the bill.

CHAC: Only one, but they get 6 demerit points for breaking it in the first place.

Moreton Bay College: One - she holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

Lourdes Hill: Eleven - one to screw it and ten to support its sexual orientation.

Balmoral: Three - one to change it and two to try and figure out if you can get high off the old one.

St. Laurie's: Ten - one to change it, one back up if the first guy's too drunk and the other eight to pray that it works.

Kelvin Grove (Queensland Dance School of Excellence): Five - one to change the bulb and four to do an interpretative dance about it.

Carmel C ollege: Seven - one to change the light bulb and six to throw a party because he didn't screw it in upside down this time.

Wynnum North: None they don't have light bulbs...they are too fucked up...people smash them and try to kill them selves with them but if you told someone there was a broken light bulb they would probably try to fix it even though there isn't one there because they are so stoned to get light bulbs for the school!

Sommerville: None - with fluoro green uniforms, its better in the dark.

BBC: Seven - one to change it and the other 6 to stand around playing soggy sao's while he does it.

Iona: Five - one to change it, 3 to stare at his arse while he does it and 2 to burn a hedge down, just for the hell of it.

Girls Grammar: Five - one to change the bulb, one to make sure her nails don't break, one to curl her hair, one to make sure her outfit matches the light and one to make sure her shoes match as well.

Nudgee: None - they don't have any money left after all the imports.

Toowoomba Grammar: none - they don't have electricity yet.

All Hallows: Four - one to change it and the other three to bitch about what a shit job she did.

Terrace: Two - one to screw it in, and the other to gel his hair while he does it.

Villanova: Two - one to fix it an d one to look in a dictionary to discover what the heck a "light bulb" is anyway.

Ipswich Grammar: None - they can't find a shop selling light bulbs within a 200km radius of Ipswich.

St. Eddies: just one guy to make the lightbulb fall in love with him... but it dont matter cause he'll just go screw some other lightbulb anyway...

Boys Grammar: Twenty One - one to change the bulb and 20 to hang out at the Queen Street Mall...

Brisbane State High: Ten - one to change it, one to break the old one and stab the guy fixing the light cause he looked at him 'funny' and a crew of eight to fight them both for no particular reason.

Wynnum State High: Thirty One - one chic to actually change it, fifteen guys to look up her skirt, ten guys to see if they have enough money to pay her for a one night stand and five to smoke pot while they are skipping class.
MSM College: None - they call the Marist guys and get them to do it for them.

Marist Ashgrove: None - they return the call and get the MSM girls to return the favor.

Ferny Grove: None, their tree friends help them out.

Stuartholme: 5, one to screw the bulb, 2 to hold her up there and the other two to hold the chair that the first two are on.

Mitchelton State High: none - why waste money on light bulbs when they can waste it on their cricket fields?? (or fencing in their "students/animals")

Loretto College: First you gotta find the blasted place (hint: Year 10 Marist Dancing Lessons... remind most of you?

Loretto College: 10, 3 to change the light bulb, two to sit on their arses watching and 5 to sit around wishing their boyfriends where there to help.

Redlands College: 1 to ask Mr patterson if they can... wait while he asks god if its ok oops none coz mr patterson (and god) would say no co z it promotes sex.

St. Mary's: i dunno... but i'm sure they'll make it into an act at their musical next year.. at least it would be more interesting then this year...

Malanda High: the entire skool population coz its the most exciting thing thats happened there since the freakin skool opened!

Forest Lake College: none, they're too busy pretending they don't live near Inala

Clayfield College: doesn't matter, those girls will screw anything

Macgregor High: 3 to change the light bulb, 2 to act as interprators so they can understand eachothers languages, 2 to work out why a scotish school has no people from Scotland in it and an extra 3 girls trying to find new ways to make their skirts shorter.

Queensland University of Technology (QUT): 1 to design a nuclear-powered lightbulb that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Brisbane using that nuked lightbulb, 1 to change the lighbulb, 1 to crack under the pressure, 10 to share the experience, 5 to write a report on the importance of lighbulbs in today modern society, 50 to protest the lightbulb's right to not change, 25 to hold a counter-protest, 1 to write the computer program that controls the wall switch, the whole creative industries faculty that to commemorate the event with an interpretative song and dance routine, 20 that turned up for the extra 6 credit points, 1 to hand out the coffee and guarana refreshments, 5 that stumbled over from the bar to see if theer is going to be a party, and 1 to say loudly how a QUT student can change a lighbulb just as well as any Griffith student (it a whole campus affair)

Rosewood High: if they're anything like Jacqui, they'll just be standing around ringing BRISSIE people asking 'What does that mean? Lightbulb what?'

Sunnybank High: Well once they find out Macgregor has 'changed' a lightbulb, they'll have to get the whole school to change all of theirs, before bashing up the Macgregor 'changers' in the pathway upto Garden City.

STMC: 10... 5 guys to try and work out how they actually screw in a lightbulb, their gurlfriends standing behind bitching about how gurls at Clairvaux/Sunnybank/Macgregor/Browns Plains are such sluts, and a few others just standing around trying to convince people that their school REALLY is a private school ('see it says college!')

Park Ridge High: The whole 'How to change a Lightbulb' class... its right after there 'Teenage Pregnancy' class and right before 'How not to look stoned at School' class...

Browns Plains High: None... they're all over at the 'Grand' Plaza hanging around the bus station

St. James: 5...One chick to change it and 2 other chicks to give their boyfriends blow jobs on a park bench.

Holland Park High: all of them...the schools the biggest shit heaP that no one could care less but they would all go and hide and smoke pot.

Whites Hill College: none...They are too busy wondering why the hell they'd change the name of the school to make it sound remotely sofisticated when clearly it's not!

Send this on to all of your high school friends!