Wednesday, 19 March 2003
Tuesday, 18 March 2003
Saturday, 15 March 2003
他大概會很慘吧
他大概會很慘吧
我有同事喝醉了,硬拉我們去卡拉OK,還說誰不去就跟誰吵,我們沒辦法把他扶上車,
往他家直奔了去,騙他說是去卡拉OK.
到了他家,他老婆開的門,他一把抱住他老婆還笑嘻嘻的對我們說:這小姐挺漂亮
的,有點像我老婆!他老婆臉色頓時就變了,只是看我們在沒有發作,就回睡房了.
那老兄招呼我們到客廳坐著,要我們點歌,然後對我們說他上個廁所,進了廁所不到一分鐘,他家的電話就響起來了,他老婆出來接的電話,沒聽半分鐘就“啪”的把電話給摔了,接著那老兄就從廁所出來了,對我們興高采烈的叫道:兄弟們,今晚好好的玩吧,我已經打電話回家說我今晚加班不回來了.
我有同事喝醉了,硬拉我們去卡拉OK,還說誰不去就跟誰吵,我們沒辦法把他扶上車,
往他家直奔了去,騙他說是去卡拉OK.
到了他家,他老婆開的門,他一把抱住他老婆還笑嘻嘻的對我們說:這小姐挺漂亮
的,有點像我老婆!他老婆臉色頓時就變了,只是看我們在沒有發作,就回睡房了.
那老兄招呼我們到客廳坐著,要我們點歌,然後對我們說他上個廁所,進了廁所不到一分鐘,他家的電話就響起來了,他老婆出來接的電話,沒聽半分鐘就“啪”的把電話給摔了,接著那老兄就從廁所出來了,對我們興高采烈的叫道:兄弟們,今晚好好的玩吧,我已經打電話回家說我今晚加班不回來了.
Wednesday, 12 March 2003
朋友 - 真正的v.s.普通的
真正的v.s.普通的
一個普通的朋友從未看過你哭泣。一個真正的朋友有雙肩讓你的淚水濕盡。
一個普通的朋友不知道你父母的姓氏。一個真正的朋友有他們的電話在通訊錄上。
一個普通的朋友會帶瓶葡萄酒參加你的派對。一個真正的朋友會早點來幫你準備並且為了幫你打掃而晚點走。
一個普通的朋友討厭你在他睡了後打來。一個真正的朋友會問為什麼現在才打來。
一個普通的朋友找你談論你的困擾。一個真正的朋友找你解決你的困擾。
一個普通的朋友對你的羅曼史感到好奇。一個真正的朋友可以威脅你說出來。
一個普通的朋友在拜訪時,像一個客人一樣。一個真正的朋友會打開冰箱自己拿東西。
一個普通的朋友在吵架後就認為友誼已經結束。一個真正的朋友明白當你們還沒打過架就不叫真正的友誼。
一個普通的朋友期望你永遠在他身邊陪他。一個真正的朋友期望他能永遠陪在你身旁!
把這篇傳給任何你關心的人-如果有傳回給你代表你已經找到真正的朋友了!球是一個圈子,沒有起始,也沒有結束。它把我們結合在一起,像一圈子的朋友。但是留給你去看的秘密寶藏就是你給予我的珍貴友誼。今天我把友誼的球傳遞給你, 請你傳給任何一位你的朋友.
一個普通的朋友從未看過你哭泣。一個真正的朋友有雙肩讓你的淚水濕盡。
一個普通的朋友不知道你父母的姓氏。一個真正的朋友有他們的電話在通訊錄上。
一個普通的朋友會帶瓶葡萄酒參加你的派對。一個真正的朋友會早點來幫你準備並且為了幫你打掃而晚點走。
一個普通的朋友討厭你在他睡了後打來。一個真正的朋友會問為什麼現在才打來。
一個普通的朋友找你談論你的困擾。一個真正的朋友找你解決你的困擾。
一個普通的朋友對你的羅曼史感到好奇。一個真正的朋友可以威脅你說出來。
一個普通的朋友在拜訪時,像一個客人一樣。一個真正的朋友會打開冰箱自己拿東西。
一個普通的朋友在吵架後就認為友誼已經結束。一個真正的朋友明白當你們還沒打過架就不叫真正的友誼。
一個普通的朋友期望你永遠在他身邊陪他。一個真正的朋友期望他能永遠陪在你身旁!
把這篇傳給任何你關心的人-如果有傳回給你代表你已經找到真正的朋友了!球是一個圈子,沒有起始,也沒有結束。它把我們結合在一起,像一圈子的朋友。但是留給你去看的秘密寶藏就是你給予我的珍貴友誼。今天我把友誼的球傳遞給你, 請你傳給任何一位你的朋友.
A Very Smart Multimillionaire
A blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says she's going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce. The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a $250,000 Rolls as collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies....."Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
Finally, a smart blonde joke.
An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says, "Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The blonde replies....."Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
Finally, a smart blonde joke.
Monday, 10 March 2003
Be aware no matter where you are ...
Be aware no matter where you are ...
NIGHT CLUB RAPE
A woman at a prominent Auckland nightclub on Saturday night (01March) was taken by 5 men, who according to hospital and police reports, gang raped her before dumping her naked up North. Unable to remember the events of the evening, tests later confirmed the repeat rapes along with traces of Rohypnol in her blood.
Boyfriends and girlfriends, take heed. Progesterex, that is an essentially a small sterilisation pill. The drug is now being used by rapists at parties to rape AND sterilize their victims.
Progesterex is available to vets to sterilize large animals. Rumour has it that the Progesterex is being used together with Rohypnol, the date rape drug. As with Rohypnol, all they have to do is drop it into the girl's drink. The girl can't remember a thing the next morning, of all that had taken place the night before Progesterex, which dissolves in drinks just as easily, is such that the victim doesn't conceive from the rape and the rapist needn't worry about having a paternity test identifying him months later.
The drug's affects ARE NOT TEMPORARY - They are P*E*R*M*A*N*E*N*T
Progesterex was designed to sterilize horses. Any female that takes it WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO CONCEIVE.
The weasels can get this drug from anyone who is in the vet school or any university. It's that easy, and Progesterex is about to break out big on campuses everywhere. Believe it or not there is even a site on the internet showing people how to use it. Please forward this to everyone you know, especially girls.
Be careful when you're out and don't leave your drink unattended. Please make the effort to forward this on to all you know.
*pretty scary huh?*
NIGHT CLUB RAPE
A woman at a prominent Auckland nightclub on Saturday night (01March) was taken by 5 men, who according to hospital and police reports, gang raped her before dumping her naked up North. Unable to remember the events of the evening, tests later confirmed the repeat rapes along with traces of Rohypnol in her blood.
Boyfriends and girlfriends, take heed. Progesterex, that is an essentially a small sterilisation pill. The drug is now being used by rapists at parties to rape AND sterilize their victims.
Progesterex is available to vets to sterilize large animals. Rumour has it that the Progesterex is being used together with Rohypnol, the date rape drug. As with Rohypnol, all they have to do is drop it into the girl's drink. The girl can't remember a thing the next morning, of all that had taken place the night before Progesterex, which dissolves in drinks just as easily, is such that the victim doesn't conceive from the rape and the rapist needn't worry about having a paternity test identifying him months later.
The drug's affects ARE NOT TEMPORARY - They are P*E*R*M*A*N*E*N*T
Progesterex was designed to sterilize horses. Any female that takes it WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO CONCEIVE.
The weasels can get this drug from anyone who is in the vet school or any university. It's that easy, and Progesterex is about to break out big on campuses everywhere. Believe it or not there is even a site on the internet showing people how to use it. Please forward this to everyone you know, especially girls.
Be careful when you're out and don't leave your drink unattended. Please make the effort to forward this on to all you know.
*pretty scary huh?*
Friday, 7 March 2003
GOD
IF SOMEONE HAD A GUN HELD IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE AND ASKED YOU IF YOU BELIEVED IN GOD, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? SAY NO AND FEEL ASHAMED THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? OR SAY YES, I DO, AND DIE STANDING UP FOR GOD? IF YOU'D SAY NO, THEN DELETE THIS E-MAIL. IF YOU WOULD SAY YES, AND STAND UP FOR JESUS CHRIST, PLEASE READ THIS AND PASS ON.
Note: This is a true article that was printed in a southern newspaper less then a year ago
TAKE A DEEP BREATH BEFORE READING THIS
There was an atheist couple who had a child. The couple never told their daughter anything about the Lord. One night when the little girl was 5 years old, the parents fought with each other and the dad shot the Mom, right in front of the child. Then, the dad shot ! himself. The little girl watched it all. She then was sent to a foster home. The foster mother was a Christian and took the child to church. On the first day of Sunday School, the foster mother told the teacher that the girl had never heard of Jesus, and to have patience with her. The teacher held up a picture of Jesus and said, "Does anyone know who this is?" The little girl said, "I do, that's the man who was holding me the night my parents died."
If you believe this little girl is telling the truth that even though she had never heard of Jesus, he still held her the night her parents died, then you will forward this to as many people as you can.
Or you can delete it as if it never touched your heart.
Funny, isn't it?
Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.
Funny how everyone wants to go to heaven provided they do not have to believe, think, say, or do anything the Bible says. (Or is it scary?)
Funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also "believes" in God).
Funny how you can send a thousand 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.
Funny how the lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but the public discussion of Jesus is suppressed in the school and workplace.
Funny how someone can be so fired up for Christ on Sunday, but be an invisible Christian the rest of the week. (Are you laughing?)
Funny how when you go to forward this message,you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them. be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me. (Are you thinking?)
Pass this on only if you mean it.
Yes, I do Love God
Note: This is a true article that was printed in a southern newspaper less then a year ago
TAKE A DEEP BREATH BEFORE READING THIS
There was an atheist couple who had a child. The couple never told their daughter anything about the Lord. One night when the little girl was 5 years old, the parents fought with each other and the dad shot the Mom, right in front of the child. Then, the dad shot ! himself. The little girl watched it all. She then was sent to a foster home. The foster mother was a Christian and took the child to church. On the first day of Sunday School, the foster mother told the teacher that the girl had never heard of Jesus, and to have patience with her. The teacher held up a picture of Jesus and said, "Does anyone know who this is?" The little girl said, "I do, that's the man who was holding me the night my parents died."
If you believe this little girl is telling the truth that even though she had never heard of Jesus, he still held her the night her parents died, then you will forward this to as many people as you can.
Or you can delete it as if it never touched your heart.
Funny, isn't it?
Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.
Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.
Funny how everyone wants to go to heaven provided they do not have to believe, think, say, or do anything the Bible says. (Or is it scary?)
Funny how someone can say "I believe in God" but still follow Satan (who, by the way, also "believes" in God).
Funny how you can send a thousand 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire, but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.
Funny how the lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene pass freely through cyberspace, but the public discussion of Jesus is suppressed in the school and workplace.
Funny how someone can be so fired up for Christ on Sunday, but be an invisible Christian the rest of the week. (Are you laughing?)
Funny how when you go to forward this message,you will not send it to many on your address list because you're not sure what they believe, or what they will think of you for sending it to them. be more worried about what other people think of me than what God thinks of me. (Are you thinking?)
Pass this on only if you mean it.
Yes, I do Love God
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)










